I'm That Creep

If I could sit in a crowded place, the mall for example, and watch people all day without them knowing it, I totally would. For someone that doesn’t like to interact with strangers or people in general, if I can help it, I do find them extremely interesting. They especially are when they don’t know that they are being watched. Everyone acts differently when they feel like they are not being observed.  

Even when they know I am standing there watching they are still interesting to me. I like to study people and see their little quirks. For example, there is a young lady that I work with that I like to watch. To be honest, she didn’t make a very good first impression with me. She seemed a little chaotic and high strung for my taste. Now that I am getting to know her a little better, I like her. She seems to be a kind-hearted person who craves girl time. In fact, I overheard her speaking of this the other day. She was talking about how she has to have a girlfriend to talk to. I can tell she is telling the truth of this by her actions. Another co-worker came in dressed very nice as if she just left an interview. The lady I watch immediately started asking her questions about how it went and I could see the sincerity in her face. She had just finished her shift and took time to sit with the other co-worker to hear all the details about wherever it was she had been. She seems like she would be a good friend. 

I admit I am a little picky about who I choose to watch. If I know you, even a little bit, and I don’t like you or your personality doesn’t vibe with mine, I will not watch you. I don’t find you interesting. I don’t want to learn more about you. Your quirks and your life do not hold my attention.  

I realize I sound like a total creep that stalks people. I don’t see it that way, of course. I am not going to follow you around or come to your home just to watch you through your windows. I promise to only watch you if you happen to be in my general vicinity.  

Now, if you catch me looking at you, I get shy. Even if we are having a one-on-one conversation, I have trouble making eye contact for some reason. I can do it, just not for very long. It’s like I start getting self-conscious and have to look elsewhere.  

When I am watching someone, I think of it as studying them; learning what their habits are, watching their facial expressions, seeing if I can read their emotions. When I see little oddities that people have, it makes them even more beautiful to me. That’s why I like to watch when they aren’t looking. If they feel like they can’t be themselves, then they are hiding something that they think other people might not like. I like to see people’s differences and learn what it is about that human being that makes them stand out from everyone else.  

So, yes, I am that creep. If you ever feel like someone is watching you, it’s probably me.